Gwen stood at the counter of The Glazed Goodness coffee shop. Her agave sweetened latte was handed to her by the barista with the beautiful eyes. She politely said, “thank you,” carefully turned to her left, and spilled the 130 degree beverage down the front of a very surprised man. Gwen was stunned silent and grew red in the face, as person after person turned to look in her direction.
This was due to the fact that Lev, the surprised man covered in 130 degree agave sweetened latte, was jumping up and down grabbing his injured crotch.
Once the entire shop was looking in their direction, a soft laugh started amongst a table near the front window. The laugh began to spread from table to table, until even the barista with the beautiful eyes gave a chuckle.
Gwen was mortified. She had never once been the butt of a joke she didn’t tell. Embarrassment did not suit her, and she currently wore it like an overcoat.
Lev on the other hand was quite accustomed to being the butt of many jokes. However in his present circumstance, this did not console him. From his belly button down to his knees, he was soaked in scalding milk. Lev was determined to keep his steaming clothes off his delicate parts -his crotch being of particular concern.
“Stop it,” Gwen suddenly said to Lev. “Stop grabbing at yourself.” Her face had turned a geranium shade of red.
Lev nearly did stop, in disbelief. His mouth dropped open, but his hands diligently kept up the good fight.
“It’s hot!” Lev exclaimed.
Gwen gave a stamp of her foot as the laughter in The Glazed Goodness blossomed into a garden. She noticed the beautiful eyed barista place a cup of cold water on the counter. Gwen grabbed the cup, and before Lev could react, she drenched him for a second time.
“What is wrong with you?” Lev gasped in astonishment. He looked even more pitiful than before. Gwen’s aim was not perfect, and though she did get some cool water on his crotch, most of it had splashed from the belly button up to his neck. Lev looked like a wet puppy in a store selling $6 lattes. Gwen was to blame. The patrons of The Glazed Goodness were loving every second of it.
It was at this point, Gwen turned whiter than a wedding dress and promptly fainted. Her legs buckled and if it hadn’t been for Lev catching her falling frame, she would have bashed her left temple on the corner of the counter on the way down.
I cannot say what dreams or thoughts Gwen had while unconscious. Whether of terror or elation, only she knows.
She awoke thirty seconds later. Her eyes batted open, disoriented by the fact she was staring up at the ceiling with Lev’s face in the way. His concerned expression turned to a smile, and Gwen was fixated upon it. Lev’s smile was genuine, a bit meek, but held nothing but relief that she was awake.
“I’m sorry,” said Gwen, “for being so foolish.”
“It’s ok,” Lev responded. “The water did help a bit. It was just…unexpected.”
“Can you help me get home?” Gwen asked.
“Yes,” Lev said. “I don’t think it’s wise to walk alone.”